For whatever reason, there were more raunchy Christmas plays this year than ever before. Not surprisingly, many were gay-themed, most were confined to the east and west coasts, and all were loved by art critics. The plays ran the gamut from the irreverent to the extremely vulgar.

New York City is a natural home for such fare. Naked performers were seen in “Naked Holidays NYC ‘09” and “Filthy Lucre: A Burlesque Christmas Carol”; the latter is the work of the anti-Catholic homosexual Christopher Durang. Gays also flocked to see “The Gayest Christmas Pageant Ever!” and “Santa Claus is Coming Out.” Those who wished to see baby Jesus electrocuted went to see “Hot Babes in Toyland,” while those who wanted to see a fetal rabbit morph into baby Jesus attended “A Very Sandwich Christmas.”

“XMAS!” was hosted by Columbia University; the play depicts the Virgin Mary begging for sex. “The Eight: Reindeer Monologues” was performed in Philadelphia and features a discussion of Santa raping Vixen.

On the west coast, “How the Drag Queen Stole Christmas” was shown in Oakland, and Seattle was home to “Ham for the Holidays: Lard Potion No. 9,” a play that sparkles with a “teeny-tiny Sequin Gay Men’s Chorus.” Also in Seattle was “It Came from Under the Tree!: A Pickled Puppet Christmas Special” that features nudity and a Michael Jackson character who envies Santa’s way with children.

Playing on both coasts was Mimi Imfurst’s “Madonna’s Christmas Celebration,” one that features a sexual deviant dressed in drag as the Blessed Virgin: he/she talks about the difficulty of having sex with God, and that he/she coined the phrase “Oh, my God” while having sex with him.

For some reason, we could not find a single play disrespecting Ramadan. Cowardice, of course, is a trademark of sissies.